In youth, the prospect of becoming an old maid will not please any girl. But nevertheless, not everyone succeeds in establishing a personal life. And the point is not at all in appearance, rather in character. What signs indicate that you are at risk of being left alone?
1. Low self-esteem
Once again, looking at your reflection in the mirror, you think: “I would have longer legs and a narrower waist, and then someone would definitely fall in love with me” or “Who would like me like that, I have a big nose!”.
What to do about it?
Learn to love yourself! Set aside one day a week to devote only to yourself: take a bath, massage with a body scrub, rub your skin with aromatic oil. Or visit a beauty salon. Grooming gives confidence to any girl. Therefore, do not cling to the flaws of your appearance, but strive to become better..
2. High self-esteem
You have been taught from childhood that you are special and that you must have a fabulous destiny, like in a Hollywood movie. But now you are 30, and the prince is still gone. You refuse to go on a date because one has an irregular ear, and the other does not emphasize words correctly. Anyway, you need a tall brown-haired man with a car and an apartment.
What to do about it?
Give a chance to a man who is interested in you. Let him show you, do not refuse to meet. A man may not open up to you right away and seem boring or rude to you. Money and looks won’t make you happier. And not all men of dreams actually turn out to be good husbands..
3. On weekends, all the time at home
While friends go to cafes and attend events, you sit at home, watch TV shows and dream of love. And for all the questions you have prepared an excuse: “Who needs it, and they will find a house!”
What to do about it?
To understand that the days when girls sitting at home and baking pies were appreciated are long gone. Today, if you are not active and you have no ambitions, you may be left without a relationship. Men simply will not see you, will not appreciate your intelligence and attractiveness, because you do not go out..
4. Disgust towards men
You can’t even imagine how others live with men, wash their dirty shirts and socks. And the picture, when a man sits on the couch drinking beer, makes you shiver. In your opinion, men are like pets and you are not ready to “have” one in your clean house..
What to do about it?
Learn to accept men for who they are. There are no ideal people. And you will simply be left alone because of the fear of socks or the fact that someone will throw things around. Are these restrictions supposed to govern your life? Or do you still want to find your soul mate? Opening yourself up to relationships will help you understand how wrong you were when you thought badly about men..
5. Look out for signs of attention
On Friday, a colleague smiled at you SO that you are already making plans for a joint future. And on Monday he didn’t even say hello to you. Your thoughts: “Probably, he was offended by something or he doesn’t like me anymore, but why did he smile at me SO on Friday?” And next week a neighbor helped you bring the packages, and you are already making plans for family life with him.
What to do about it?
Of course, get rid of illusions. Men will not hint to you about a relationship, but boldly declare their sympathy. While you are daydreaming, you can miss real manifestations of feelings. Take a closer look at your surroundings, maybe some man has been trying to invite you to dinner for several days in a row.
6. Do not accept courtship from men
You were invited to the cinema, and during the session he put his hand on your knee. “I knew he was definitely a womanizer,” you might think and run away from him at the first opportunity. And if he invites you to his home for dinner or gives flowers, then you can even be rude to him.
What to do about it?
Try to adequately assess the situation. Very often, what you come up with for yourself, in fact, is not. Flowers are given to you because this man will like you. He tries so hard to make you feel good, to remind you of himself, and you take it as an insult. Do not look for meaning in courtship, but try to enjoy the candy-bouquet period.
7. Fear of sex
“Yes, all men need only one thing, so sex only after the wedding. And it’s better if it doesn’t exist at all. Yes, I am not like others, I don’t need this ”.
What to do about it?
If you are over 25 years old, then go to a psychologist so that he understands the reason for the fear of intimacy. Perhaps all the problems are due to unsuccessful relationships in the past. It’s also worth checking your hormones. If everything is in order with the first and second, then you are disingenuous and are simply afraid to admit that you are tired of being alone. Be honest, no one will judge you.
8. Joy when other couples break up
Your friend married in her youth and had children, and then her husband left her. And you cannot hide your joy, once again convinced that it is better to be alone.
What to do about it?
Pay attention to other examples where married people are happy and raise children together. Perhaps you will feel irritated, but then feel the family warmth. The main thing is patience and a firm belief that you do not want to remain an old maid..
9. Judgment of those who easily start relationships
You do not believe that in a month you can fall in love with someone and start a life together. And your pretty friend easily makes acquaintances. You think this is dirty and inappropriate behavior for a woman. You have a fad about these girls and you just hate them..
What to do about it?
Most likely, the reason for condemnation is banal envy, but you cannot admit it to yourself. Understand yourself, maybe you like that men always look at these girls, because they are funny and active. The best medicine for you will be a new hobby. Sign up for fitness or English lessons (it never hurts) so you won’t have time to judge. Open up to the new.
10. Negative attitude
You just woke up, and already tired and dissatisfied with life. You do not like the weather, you get into the transport with a gloomy face and are already in the mood for a scandal. As soon as someone pushes you or steps on your foot, you immediately explode, and then you feel relief. And you don’t want to hear about men, because you are sure that they spoil life and only know how to deceive.
What to do about it?
It is important to understand that negativity builds up in you due to feelings of loneliness. Everyone is not opposed to you, much less men. Try to vent your emotions elsewhere: go karaoke with your friends, listen to loud music, or start jogging in the morning. As soon as a smile appears on your face instead of a gloomy mine, men will definitely begin to pay attention to you..
11. Boring wardrobe
You walk past shop windows with bright and beautiful outfits, but don’t dare to try on something on yourself, and once again buy a shapeless hoodie. And in recent years, you have never pampered yourself with a dress, only spend money on trousers and turtlenecks.
What to do about it?
Seek help from a friend or stylist to find the items in which you feel comfortable and do not look like a gray mouse. You will be surprised how your attitude changes. Men always pay attention to feminine silhouettes, but it is not necessary to wear a tight dress in the style of Kim Kardashian, it is enough to emphasize the waist, and let everything else be hidden from men’s eyes.
12. Lack of cosmetics
You’ve heard what a highlighter is, but have no idea how to use it. Of the decorative cosmetics, you have only one lipstick, which you use to paint your lips on special occasions. And on other days, do not paint at all. You don’t have any cosmetics either, because you think that they won’t help you and it’s a waste of money..
What to do about it?
Assess your skin condition. If you already have wrinkles, then you should start taking care of yourself immediately. Do you want to please yourself and others? Ask your makeup artist to paint you up and advise you on what makeup is right for you. Then get a basic makeup kit: mascara, blush, powder and, of course, lipstick. Cosmetics are created to highlight your strengths and hide flaws.
13. Lack of movement
Sometimes it seems to you that life has stood still, already 5 years ago. You work the same job, talk to the same people, and go to the same places. You are not developing, either morally or physically. Your athletic form leaves much to be desired, and from new hobbies – only the new season of your favorite TV series.
What to do about it?
Life is the energy of movement. The more you move, the more energy you have. Go to the gym or just for a run in the park. It is difficult to start, but strength will appear already in the process. Sign up for refresher courses or a foreign language, go on a trip. Take action!
14. Don’t ask others for help
You left the airport and haul heavy things to the taxi yourself, instead of asking some handsome man for help. When your equipment breaks down, you try to fix it yourself, and then you are proud of yourself. It is important for you to prove to yourself that you do not need a man and you can do everything yourself.
What to do about it?
Get rid of illusions and finally admit to yourself that after you have done something yourself, you do not feel satisfied. Then your hands hurt from heavy loads, but you don’t understand the technique and read the instructions for the device for an hour. Just ask a man you know, a work colleague, or friend for help. This is not to be ashamed of. And this step towards men will help you open up and change your attitude towards them..